Eight questions to ask when looking for a Christian boyfriend or girlfriend
Although the Bible does not have a specific rule for dating or criteria for Mr. Right and Ms. Right, it does list the qualities you should look for in a relationship. Being called a Christian is not a sufficient measure in deciding who to date or go steady with. If you are dating a non-Christian unbeliever, scripture will tell you that you are headed in the wrong direction.
The following list can help you decide if you should take it to the next level.
1. Humble & Teachable
Ephesians 4:2; Proverbs 9:9
If its a boyfriend you are looking for, remember that the man is the leader of the house, he is accountable to God for the kind of family he will raise. Thus, a young man preparing for such should be humble and teachable.
2. Looks you in the eyes
Is your future boyfriend or girlfriend a habitual liar? There are two kinds of liars: one who does it well and the opposite. The most common lies in dating are trying to be someone else and hiding motives by being overconfident. Watch for the red flags: they often avoid the subject in question, they have a slow response to it and avoids eye contact.
3. Priority is not you
Being a Christian alone is not enough reason to go steady, it’s just a label. What is more important is “godliness” and one way to measure it is through habits. Does he/she belong to a small group or is active in the ministry, sharing the love of Jesus? Does he/she talk often about what God is doing in his/her life or does he/she talk more about himself/herself?
4. Loves because God loved first
1 John 3:18
A dating stage is usually sweet and romantic. A Christian who has experienced God’s love is able to genuinely love back. True love is unselfish and puts the other person’s interest first. Equally important, it should be consistent and tested with time.
5. Promise keepers
If in the early stage of dating, your prospective boyfriend or girlfriend could not keep a promise, integrity may be an issue. Integrity is not only measured by being honest.
6. Friendship goals
“Relationships” is a partnership and the most successful ones are those that began with friendship. The mark of a lasting relationship is how each other is able to help and support one another in time of crisis. Which goes to say, “I married my best friend”.
7. Someone who saves
1 Timothy 5:8
Once married, the man of the house is expected to fully provide for his family. Financial problem is a leading cause of divorce, Christian or non-Christian. The problem stems from being materialistic. A gentleman will not allow a lady to pay for his share of the bill, if he did for whatever reason, avoid the guy.
8. Family matters
How a person behaves with his own family is indicative of how he or she will treat you in times of crisis. Likewise, a young man who is too dependent on his mother will have difficulties in establishing his own relationships.